The Nanny Conundrum

26!... 26! This kept playing over and over in my head. Has it really been that many? Did I loose count?

As I sat to listen to my nanny tell me she is leaving that evening, and my mind went blank for a bit, then I told her thank you for her services and dismissed her. I was too tired and too dazed to wonder why she was leaving, it was always the same excuses anyway: too little pay, long hours, Giovanni is too heavy, a misunderstanding perhaps, they just can't do the job, their back hurts, I could go on and on. 

I decided to sit down and with my fingers I started mentioning the names of each nanny, carer that has ever looked after our son.

26. A whooping 26, ladies and gentlemen! Now people will have mixed feelings about who is to blame, yes there were misunderstandings in some cases, others were sacked and some left because they simply couldn't handle it. 26 ladies; young and middle-aged have passed through this house. 

I'm very particular about nannies and carers so once I feel it's not working I just ask you nicely to go. Giovanni needs someone gentle, empathetic not sympathetic and someone caring. No matter how much you train some of them, if the love and understanding is not there for your child it would be very difficult to keep this person. We have had all sorts of nannies and carers and there are a few things I have learned through this nanny journey:

Pray for your child fervently 
Even if the person comes with evil intentions, your child is already covered with the blood of Jesus. Once you pray for your child and against any evil intentions. Your child is protected in Jesus' name. Most importantly the children who cannot communicate if someone is doing something bad. 

Study your child's mannerisms
Be very observant of your children. Study their behaviour when a new nanny is employed. Does their behavior change? Do they become sad, irritated, moody, quiet, scared? Check your child physically too, for bruises or any form of injury regularly.  Giovanni always has a way of letting me know he is unhappy with a nanny. And when I see he is unhappy, I sack the person.



Pray for the person coming into your household
One incident I had which I thank God never happened again was the over confident nanny that stole my clothes, wore them and put them up on WhatsApp as her display picture. I laugh now about it because it's so funny but back then I was furious!  I tell you, she had some kind of vim. When she was finally leaving and we searched her bag I found loads of clothes she claimed she bought from Makola, my wedding pictures, and other items. Of course she stole money too. I prayed about the lady before she came to my house but she was just a witch and was on a mission. I took her to the police station and even the police admitted she was a hardened criminal, I dropped the case because I was wasting time and money and she was far from being remorseful for her actions. Apparently she has joined a gang of armed robbers now, tormenting people and the police still haven't been able to grab here. So what am I driving at here? Well you need to pray over the person coming to your household. Even if the person comes with evil intentions, prayers may change a lot. Ever since this nanny left my house, anointing oil was flowing everywhere in my house. lol I was on an anointing oil spree.

Set up cameras in your house
If you can afford it, please set up cameras, and let the nanny know you're watching them so they do not misbehave. Many of the issues I discovered were thanks to the cameras. One nanny bathing Gio and rubbing soap all over his face and pouring water directly onto his face, knowing very well he cannot close his mouth. And his eyes would be all red in the morning right after a bath. He would squint and complain and I would ask her what the problem is and she would say she doesn't know and that he is always like this, at first I thought was an allergy but then I knew something was wrong when it just kept occuring. I watched from my phone and saw with my own eyes, I was so upset that day. The wicked goose could have drowned my child. Someone too kept in one diaper all day, only to honk my horn at the gate and she ran helter skelter to change the diaper. Yes our baby has been through a lot, and you can imagine that there are people this wicked that exist. 

Lastly, follow your gut feeling.
Mothers always have a hunch when it comes to their children. Now I'm not talking about that initial feeling of when you have just employed a nanny and you're going to work, worried. That's a normal feeling and should go away after a week or so. I;m talking about that feeling when you're unsure of someone, or have difficulty trusting someone with your child, you're probably right for feeling that way. Pray about it, talk to someone about it and make the right decsision for your child. 
  
Agents do not make things any easier for us, They always want to charge more than the usual just because they believe your child is different or needs extra special attention. As if life isn't already expensive enough for special needs families. Everything costs double or triple, now nannies too.  If it's a health care assistant, I understand, since they have received some form of formal training. 

The stigma in our society makes caregivers afraid of kids like Giovanni. I remember one nanny told me her parents weren't happy she was coming to look after 'such a child' and advised her to not take the job. Others have also said that since they do not have children yet, they are afraid that they may get a 'sick' child after interacting with Giovanni. I'm rather surprised that I handle all this commentary pretty well. I just half smile and leave my thoughts in my head. Several have left based on this. Some too have left due to pregnancy or an up-coming wedding. 

And yes, I have shifted from agent to agent and hesitating between carers/health assistants or nannys. Because guess what? From my experience they are frankly all the same. If I get a nanny that has at least been JHS, she is smart enough to learn medication and others. Also nannies that have been to a catering school or learned how to sew, because they know how to measure, so teaching them how to administer medication is easier. I prefer nannies to carers. The carers arrive and I still have to train them as much as the nannies...I've learned a lot on ths journey. 

They are the necessary evil. There have been thieves, proud ones, miss know it alls, but there have also been a few loving and caring ones whom I'm still very much in touch with and quite grateful for their services, some have also become family, as they have been part of our journey some way some how.

How many nannies has your child had? Ever thought to count? I'm waiting to hear from readers. I know I'm not the only one. LOL Come on, spill the beans!!!! :) We are currently on number 27...

Comments

  1. I've had 13 nannies and people think that's too much lol. But I completely understand where you are coming from and my children don't have special needs. The know-it-alls, the ones who don't care at all, the thieves, the rude ones etc. Some people feel like oh nannies are hard to come by so let me keep them like that but as parents, our children's needs should be paramount and if a nanny's behaviour is detrimental to your child's progress, why let them stay. So me, I support your decisions because I've been following Giovanni's story since he was born and I must say you're one amazing mama and no one standing on the outside knows how to care for him better than you do. I've picked up a lot of good advice from this post about covering them daily with the blood of Jesus and also using anointing oil. My mum once caught a witch that way. This lady stayed for less than 24 hours but my mum had an uneasy feeling about her. So early in the morning when the girl was sweeping the yard just outside her bedroom window, she sprinkled holy water through the window on her without her knowledge. Within 10 minutes, this girl had come inside and said she needed to leave right away. She had come the evening before lol. Anyway, sorry for rambling. You're doing great mama.

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    1. Oh wow! you're half way to my count. lol. Yes the prayers always work. All the best in your nanny search.

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  2. Wow, this is much for a parent. May God give you strength to endure and make a way for a good nanny who will do a good job and stay for a long time. You are in my prayers

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  3. I think I have had 6. The 3rd was the reason I got cameras. She yelled at my little girl so much one day, my neighbour called me to complain. When I got home, my daughter was at my neighbours's house. The darling woman went for my child and refused to let her go back home to the nanny. She was gone the next morning. The last one didn't survive a week. The one before that stole my money. I don't have one right now. One raided my mum's house. It is God's grace my dear. God watches over these kids for us. I don't have one right now. I quit my job so I could stay home till the littlest is old enough to go to school. Family finances have taken a huge hit but how for do? I consider myself blessed that I can even do that

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    1. Oh wow! Thank God for neighbours who look out for our children then. And God bless you for making that sacrifice to stay home. I always admire the women who do this. It can be a tough decision like you said, especially considering finances.

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  4. Wow! 26!! Pray pray pray ! You couldn't have said it any better! May 27 be the best that you could have ever prayed for and if not, may God bless your family with one.

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