Pondering Over the 3 Years

Today we Celebrate Giovanni for Turning 3 !!!

It has not been easy: full of ups and downs, high and lows, joy and sadness, excitement and depression. We've had our bad days and our good days, all the same I still wouldn't change it for the world.

I wake up every morning and while Gio is sleeping I admire him: sweet; innocent, couldn't harm a fly and most of all BLESSED! He's been such a blessing to me! We have experienced so much grace because of this little boy of ours.

Experiencing that Mother-Son bond has made me speak out for the rights of my child and other children alike. I've become a real mama bear, ready to fight for him and protect him from any stigma or nay sayers.

The passed three years and in fact even during my pregnancy, I've learned a lot: 

Give Thanks

I think we all go through the why me phase when something bad happens to us. I have learned to give thanks to God regardless of the situation. I used to cry a lot the first 6 months when he was born. Now I cry less and give thanks in all situations. Oh it can be hard, when you're on admission in the hospital and meet a rude nurse/doctor (I've had a few), but I've learned to close my eyes and smile at God.This isn't always easy, but I try my best and do it.

Support System is Everything

What would I be without my support system? My parents, my sisters, my husband ❤️, my friends? What would I be? They've heard it all and seen it all. I'm grateful for each and everyone of you! If you don’t have a support system, it’s important to create one and surround yourself with these people because you cannot do it all alone. I’m not saying rely on others but it’s ok to leave your child with someone you trust once in a while for a few hours so you get some rest. It’s also good to form relationships with other parents who have children with similar conditions so you share experiences. At least you know that there are other people who will understand your frustrations and also celebrate  the little victories your child makes every day. 

The Doubting Thomas

There will always be those that will doubt your child. Healthcare workers, family and friends. There will be doubters. But at the end of the day it's what you believe your child is capable of and what God has planned out for your child. It’s the doctor’s duty to tell you what science says and what the books say and based on research. But at the end of the day, every child is so unique that most of the time our kids prove the nay sayers wrong. It’s normal for people to doubtyour child’s ability, but you better not follow their doubting mentality. You are the one that can that lift up your child. If you think positive for them,  it will have a huge impact on them. Practice positive energy and say positive things. Words are everything in this special needs business. 

Nurse Ratched

Regardless of your journey, there will always be those who will gossip and not wish well for you.  Some people are so narrow minded and backward thinking that I don't blame them for the gossip. If I'm at your lips it simply means you dedicate a few minutes every day of your precious life to inquire about my family. I always say this class of people are special. They have time to throw stones, but they refuse to see the glass house they live in. They call us beggars during fundraising, ok if I'm classified as a beggar just to make my son better, then I claim it fully! Some people are shallow minded and always want to hear the worst of you. Those people will always exist and I've learned to shut out the negativity and live my life free from their influence and concentrate on my family. Some people live, eat, and swim in negativity. Nurse Ratched is the protagonist of one famous film called, "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest". You would have to watch the film to understand this woman's behaviour. You know when you're in a hole and trying to get yourself out, you finally see the light and you're just at the edge celebrating your victories, and there come's someone at the end of the hole, pulling your fingers off from the edge and watching you fall deep back into the hole with a smirk on his/her face: that's your Nurse Ratched right there. The people that always tell you, you can't do this or that, or you can't achieve this or that. Yup, those people exist, never doubt that. Not everyone wants the best for you. If you want to be a Nurse Ratched that's fine. It's not my style. 

Loving Unconditionally 

From pregnancy to birth, I loved Giovanni from day one; it's grown really strong now because I know how innocent he is and his struggles every day. To love a child with special/additional needs is truly unconditional love. No matter how much he cries, I can't even get angry with him. And that's the love God tries to show us in the bible, he always tells us to love our nighbour.

We are Not the Same
Our children are always compared to regular children. My child vrs child with no special needs : NOT THE SAME. Although we always fight for an inclusive society and equal opportunites for children with disabilities, it absolutely does not mean our children are the same. The amount of time, energy and care that goes into a child with special needs cannot and should never be compared to people who have regular children. And that is why we have parents support groups separate from those who have children with no special needs issues.sorry to break it to you, but our children are not the same!

Finding Our Purpose
It is my ultimate goal to give my son an opportunity to live his life to the fullest potential. And finding his purpose is top of my priorities because I know he is already serving a special purpose in my heart, but I know for a fact he has a bigger purpose and we will find it!

Will I write an emotional post every birthday? Probably yes. 

Will people get tired of me talking about my son? Probably yes. 

"Does I give a damn?" NOOOOOO. lol

Happy Birthday to Our Amazing Son Giovanni!!!!!!!